Monday, April 25, 2011

say "no" to kids

and i don't mean "no" as in "no, you can't have that candy", i mean "no" as in "no, i don't want to have kids". why?

1. i like my facebook profile picture, phone background and computer desktop to be something other than pictures of my offspring
2. i travel with minimal baggage possible. a trolly that takes 3 hours to fold to put into the scanner it not minimal. then the kid needs be carried from that point on.
3. i like my screaming to be a sign of horror or extreme excitement, not hunger or general discomfort. that applies doubly-so on airplanes
4. it's hard enough to find a place to eat. to find a place to eat that's also kid-friendly usually results in burger king
5. john. john is the name of a bank account. all money that i would spend on a kid goes into that account: education, healthcare, trolleys, you name it. in addition, john will get sick every couple of years, resulting in a single lump-sum deposit. deposits will not end when john is 18, but will probably go into his mid-to-late-20s (including his wedding, hopefully the final lump-sum deposit) unless he decides on borrowing something from his old man. john will also be my retirement egg. john has no siblings.

Sunday, April 24, 2011

event of the year

so far in 2011:
jan 14: tunisian dictator is ousted from rule after 23 years as president, following weeks of protests
jan 24: bombing in moscow airport leaves dozens dead
feb 11: egyptian dictator is forced to resign after 30 years as president, following 8 million people taking to the streets of egypt, simply asking him to leave
feb 22: earthquake strikes christchurch, australia. death toll: 182
mar 12: 8.9 earthquake strikes tokyo, followed by devastating tsunami. hundreds dead, nuclear catastrophes looming
mar 19: nato starts enforcing no-fly zone over libya using fighter jets. government suppression of freedom demonstrations claim the lives of hundreds of people
apr 29: wedding

guess which event time out dubai calls the "event of the year" on its cover.