pity friend

"behold the pity friend! yes, that one over there, the fat one. no, she doesn't do herself any favors. and yes, those pants aren't helping. watch how these hips sway, how the jeans are busting at the seams - she doesn't get the "skinny" in skinny jeans. the group of skinny "friends" around her? well, my dear friend, this is where pity friend gets her name from! see that one over there, yes one of the skinny ones, she's the whale's best friend! yes! been friends since they were toddlers (but you can guess who always stole all the cookies, no?). yeah, that group is the skinny one's clique, the hippo is tagging along, feeling out of place and fatter by the minute. what she does? she goes home and finds comfort in a tub of ice cream, a one kilo bar of chocolate or a bucket of fried chicken."